Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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