last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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