i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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