My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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