That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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