STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
