my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
