Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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