Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Randomize
