I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
