make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Panties = found
Randomize
