week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
