I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize