I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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