no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
