I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize