we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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