I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
