i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
