Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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