I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
