pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
