My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Dicks are not precious.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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