Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
