the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
