Need sex. Gaining weight.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize