yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
