hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
