How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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