i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
