Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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