so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
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