I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize