he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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