fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
