worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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