i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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