What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Randomize
