I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
