"it" just moved
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Randomize
