So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
