There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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