i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
