He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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