the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
