4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
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I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
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I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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