life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
