Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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