I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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