I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
