Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
